Funny one Liners

[Dom55]

God loves you, but everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.

 

[Deepak Kiran]

I wish all social media was as non addictive as Linked In.

 

[Deepak Kiran]

Want to reduce weight?

Turn your head right and left whenever you are given food to eat!

 

[JalJala]

Before you marry a person, you should make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they are.

 

[JalJala]

Marriage is a workshop where the husband works and the wife shops.

 

[Deepak Kiran]

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

 

[Deepak Kiran]

I am on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.

 

[Deepak Kiran]

I am so poor I can't even pay attention

 

[Deepak Kiran]

I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.

 

[Deepak Kiran]

Hard work would always beat intelligence when intelligence refuses to work hard.

 

[JalJala]

Marriage is finding one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

 

[Jack_v2]

Marriage is like a 3 Ring circus- Engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering!

 

[Snowflake]

Many girls atleast once in lifetime have most intelligent DNA in their mouth but most of them spit it out!!!

 

[ReddyGari ammai]

The sky is blue and the blue is color sky

 

[JalJala]

I'm in a long-distance relationship. My girlfriend lives in the future.

 

[Alvina]

I once named my dog- ‘girlfriend’ and that too left me.

 

[Alvina]

I'm in a long-distance relationship. My girlfriend lives in the future.

Wow

 

[JalJala]

Wow

 

[Tvmkuttan]

Some engagements end happily , others with marriage

 

[SiRa]

Most people are shocked when they find out how bad I am as an electrician.

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.

Never break someone's heart because they have only one inside...break their bones because they have 206 of them.!!