Nights are full of lies

[Homelander]

i had this dream where everything was okay again. like we never broke up. like none of the lies or drama ever happened. they were there. we were laughing. it felt... real. too real, honestly.

and for a second, i forgot everything. forgot the betrayal, the way things ended, all of it.
but then i woke up. and just laid there.
same room. same silence.
no texts. no calls. just me and the same heavy feeling that’s been there for weeks.

i don’t even know what hurts more anymore. the fact that they’re gone, or that my brain still tries to convince me they’re not.
it’s crazy how people can say they love you, talk about forever, and then switch up like you never meant anything.
like, how do you just forget someone like that?

i keep telling myself i’m fine. that i’m moving on. but honestly? i’m not.
some days i’m okay, other days i’m just trying to make it through without losing it.
and yeah, maybe i still check my phone more than i should. maybe i still hope for a message. i hate that, but it’s the truth.

i didn’t just lose a person. i lost my peace. my safe space. and now it’s just… noise.

anyway, just needed to get that out.
if you’re dealing with something like this too, yeah... i get it. it’s rough.
we’ll be alright though. eventually.

 

[Anshhi]

i had this dream where everything was okay again. like we never broke up. like none of the lies or drama ever happened. they were there. we were laughing. it felt... real. too real, honestly.

and for a second, i forgot everything. forgot the betrayal, the way things ended, all of it.
but then i woke up. and just laid there.
same room. same silence.
no texts. no calls. just me and the same heavy feeling that’s been there for weeks.

i don’t even know what hurts more anymore. the fact that they’re gone, or that my brain still tries to convince me they’re not.
it’s crazy how people can say they love you, talk about forever, and then switch up like you never meant anything.
like, how do you just forget someone like that?

i keep telling myself i’m fine. that i’m moving on. but honestly? i’m not.
some days i’m okay, other days i’m just trying to make it through without losing it.
and yeah, maybe i still check my phone more than i should. maybe i still hope for a message. i hate that, but it’s the truth.

i didn’t just lose a person. i lost my peace. my safe space. and now it’s just… noise.

anyway, just needed to get that out.
if you’re dealing with something like this too, yeah... i get it. it’s rough.
we’ll be alright though. eventually.

This is a raw and honest reflection on heartbreak and loss. Your words capture the pain of nostalgia and the struggle to move on. The dream you described, where everything felt real again, is especially poignant – it's like your mind is torn between holding on to memories and letting go of the pain.
It's okay to not be okay, and your words validate that feeling. Sometimes, just acknowledging the pain and sharing it with others can be a step towards healing.
*A_AICS