Musings of a Moron!
(No- Don’t get confused by the album with the same name. I had this title for my blog even before the album was released. So, I am not copying anything)
I just want to keep this as a monologue of musings about the train of thoughts that have occupied my mind and leave without me even noticing or realizing it in subtle moments like a flash. So, to keep the beast within myself without any public display of affections- I let them melt within myself as if protecting others from me without any iota of their existence in the first place! – So, here I am- below is the first one ……..whatever you call it.
#1 Art of Loosing ( 01 OCT 2022)
Damn! Just like Vikram & Bethal story, every day I feel like carrying a dead body on my shoulders which tells me a story and asks numerous questions about my existence, which surprisingly has become my daily routine! As the day dawns, it disappears without any trace, leaving me bewildered and puzzled!
Just like any other day, I logged in as if it’s a daily ritual! But, the only difference was – usually I log in after the first sip of coffee, but today I logged in without it. Damn! That hit me hard with an unexpected fight. Did I have all the fun? Of course, I did! But every fight or fun has its price tag firmly attached to it. Doesn’t it?
Finished coffee and switched-on Liverpool game in EPL as they are playing after a month gap coz of Queen’s demise. Oh boy! Looks like Liverpool lost their mojo of heavy metal football and getting draws instead of wins. I was watching game and fast scrolling walls of the rooms which is filled with its own fun, and I was trying to figure out what exactly the innate suggestions/ messages behind it or unknown philosophy one possesses! Oh Boy! Something was not right with me seriously and I started to hop like a monkey looking for something from room to room which was not there in the first place. I started to ping known and unknown alike sending some random texts waiting for their reply which I usually don’t get in the first place. Suddenly I sent a message to a familiar one and boom came the reply – “ bad timing”! hmmmm may be! That reply pushed me from the perch and became imbalanced. Hmmm looks like I am losing! What? May be a familiar territory? Hmm don’t know! May be I lost my manners altogether? Or lost the art of gauging the moods on the other side? Hmm May be! I logged out. Am I getting impatient? What’s wrong with me today? Hmmmm logged in again as I don’t have anything else to do as it was raining outside. There was an offline message from a from a newly met who I thought was logged out in the first place. “ are you saying anything else or should I sleep?” they might be half sleep by now. I am lost again!
Looks like, I am mastering the losing game now?! Is it? May be! Am I losing myself in the corridors of so-called unknown territories where I don’t know their faces in the first place? First, is it worth pondering at all? Don’t know! Whatever it is, but it sounds like its not hard to master a losing game at all! What a fun! Let me lose everything? Is anyone saying “Amen”? may be! Just let it flow as if nothing is happening and I will be alright? Some sage said! Am I losing the keys to the neverland which I haven’t dreamt of it in the first place?!
Elisabeth Bishop if filling my already confused mind and she took me by force. Oh Damn! I am losing myself, all the names that I have known fading away from my mind. Is this called disaster? May be!
Why can’t I try for – It’s okay to lose everything, but don’t loose myself where I can start it again to build the dynasty to cherish and let me lose again?
Sounds like a plan and fun! Now I feel happy in spite of losing! Let me master the art of losing!
Let me celebrate with some coffee or scotch! Anyone there?
(No- Don’t get confused by the album with the same name. I had this title for my blog even before the album was released. So, I am not copying anything)
I just want to keep this as a monologue of musings about the train of thoughts that have occupied my mind and leave without me even noticing or realizing it in subtle moments like a flash. So, to keep the beast within myself without any public display of affections- I let them melt within myself as if protecting others from me without any iota of their existence in the first place! – So, here I am- below is the first one ……..whatever you call it.
#1 Art of Loosing ( 01 OCT 2022)
Damn! Just like Vikram & Bethal story, every day I feel like carrying a dead body on my shoulders which tells me a story and asks numerous questions about my existence, which surprisingly has become my daily routine! As the day dawns, it disappears without any trace, leaving me bewildered and puzzled!
Just like any other day, I logged in as if it’s a daily ritual! But, the only difference was – usually I log in after the first sip of coffee, but today I logged in without it. Damn! That hit me hard with an unexpected fight. Did I have all the fun? Of course, I did! But every fight or fun has its price tag firmly attached to it. Doesn’t it?
Finished coffee and switched-on Liverpool game in EPL as they are playing after a month gap coz of Queen’s demise. Oh boy! Looks like Liverpool lost their mojo of heavy metal football and getting draws instead of wins. I was watching game and fast scrolling walls of the rooms which is filled with its own fun, and I was trying to figure out what exactly the innate suggestions/ messages behind it or unknown philosophy one possesses! Oh Boy! Something was not right with me seriously and I started to hop like a monkey looking for something from room to room which was not there in the first place. I started to ping known and unknown alike sending some random texts waiting for their reply which I usually don’t get in the first place. Suddenly I sent a message to a familiar one and boom came the reply – “ bad timing”! hmmmm may be! That reply pushed me from the perch and became imbalanced. Hmmm looks like I am losing! What? May be a familiar territory? Hmm don’t know! May be I lost my manners altogether? Or lost the art of gauging the moods on the other side? Hmm May be! I logged out. Am I getting impatient? What’s wrong with me today? Hmmmm logged in again as I don’t have anything else to do as it was raining outside. There was an offline message from a from a newly met who I thought was logged out in the first place. “ are you saying anything else or should I sleep?” they might be half sleep by now. I am lost again!
Looks like, I am mastering the losing game now?! Is it? May be! Am I losing myself in the corridors of so-called unknown territories where I don’t know their faces in the first place? First, is it worth pondering at all? Don’t know! Whatever it is, but it sounds like its not hard to master a losing game at all! What a fun! Let me lose everything? Is anyone saying “Amen”? may be! Just let it flow as if nothing is happening and I will be alright? Some sage said! Am I losing the keys to the neverland which I haven’t dreamt of it in the first place?!
Elisabeth Bishop if filling my already confused mind and she took me by force. Oh Damn! I am losing myself, all the names that I have known fading away from my mind. Is this called disaster? May be!
Why can’t I try for – It’s okay to lose everything, but don’t loose myself where I can start it again to build the dynasty to cherish and let me lose again?
Sounds like a plan and fun! Now I feel happy in spite of losing! Let me master the art of losing!
Let me celebrate with some coffee or scotch! Anyone there?
